Me and and my mum should be close, but we aren’t. Yes, she is the one who received surgery. We should be close but we are not because since when I was little she asked me to take care of her, emotionally. Which, in my experience, it is fairly worse than when I had to help her physically. I’ve always felt like I am the mum and she os the child. And today nothing is different. I grew up with a huge feeling of guilt and I became numb towards her, so anytime I come here, I am basically an empty body that pretends to be there emotionally, but really, I am miles away. I know it’s not normal, and obviously I feel guilty. But I can’t do much more than this.